Does Your Sexual Preference Affect your Thanksgiving Holiday?

[Allison]

Some of us have been abandoned by our families since coming out. Others of us have big thanksgiving days with two families! Has being gay affected your Thanksgiving Day? My parents were very accepting of me despite some discomfort, and when I was in a relationship they accepted her for every holiday as part of the family. I am a very lucky person.

This Thanksgiving I am single, but my ex and her new gf have invited me to their Thanksgiving, as my ex and I have rekindled our friendship over the past couple of years.

I hope all of you have a nice holiday, if you celebrate it.

-Allison

[Natalie Davis]

Despite the holiday's troubling history, I choose to focus not on genocidal pilgrims, but on giving thanks. And football. :)

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL... THANK GOODNESS FOR YOU!

[SistersTalk]

My family hasn't shunned me since I came out. I don't see them much because I live in Wisconsin and they're all in Georgia.

We have our "extended family" dinner today: all of our gay friends and straight allies are getting together for dinner today so we can spend tomorrow with biological family. I love this tradition. It always makes me feel so loved.

My contribution for today: wine and party games. Woot! Woot!

[Christa]

My cousin has stopped attending family gatherings. I haven't seen him in about 10 years! I don't know if he has 'come out' to family (although we know!) as of yet. I miss Sam and hope he comes to Thanksgiving.

[Linus Bourque]

Naw. The only thing that affects my Thanksgiving is work and budget :P (plus it's never been a big holiday for us).

[DENISE]

i will be alone this year for Thanksgiving because of medical reason but im ok with it . some of my siblings have shunned me since my coming out , however i have more then made up for their absence with lots of others in my life that cared about me for me . my children are always glad to see me and my grandchildren love me just the way i am . they know me no other way . sooooooooo if the others cant stand the heat they can just move on outta my fire cause im not goin any where and im not going back in the closet for them or any one else . i am greatful to have this site to visit and meet new people and to learn more about the way things are outside of my lil town . hope you all have a nice day what ever you do with it ! denise

[Queers United]

I feel affected in the sense that I can't be open amongst some family members about who I am.

[Coach Sappho]

Allison - my sexual ORIENTATION does affect my holidays. I'm now single too, but, when I was in a relationship, family accepted my partner as my 'guest' to all gatherings, however there was a subtle inequity in how we were treated. We weren't seen as equals to the straight couples and families. Of course, some of this was probably the result of my not always putting a 'request for equality' in front of family members to 'spare' them their own discomfort.

- BARB

[Kathleen M.]

I have had family drama as far back as I can remember. Some years were uglier than others. And this was before I came out 8 or 9 years ago. However, since my mother could not even bring herself to acknowledge our wedding in June added extra incentive not to make the 8 hour drive back to Arizona for a miserable Thanksgiving.

[SteadyCat]

When i was younger i felt that it did. I was always on the outside looking in - at my siblings and their spouses and their children. They seemed to think my being there made me a part of...but it didn't. Just an observer. Now that I'm much older, I haven't spent Thanksgiving with my biological family for years. I've managed to live in a different state or a different country for quite awhile. Regretfully, I never managed to make my own Thanksgiving tradition. I'm in a country that doesn't celebrate Thanksgiving and I'm also a horrible cook. So there you go. When I get back to the states I'm going to eat for old and new.

[Edna B Little Fish Spring]

My Original Family has PASSED ON, and my Mother NEVER knew about me, but I had HEARD from my Father about her, but.....I found out for sure from her Partner the day that she Passed on. How SAD that my Mother could NEVER tell me about herself, and I in turn the same.
My children know. They just wish I would find someone that is "Worthy"!
Our Thanksgiving is different..One child is in Chicago and Cooked Dinner for his Friends; another Son, cooked Dinner for his immediate Family and Friends; my Daughter stayed home and watched tV Movies and I went to a Friend's house that I have gone to for the past 25 yrs. Their Dinner is not just Family but all the Exchange Students in town that had no where else to go. Some have been coming for years, and have become Friends. Others were new this year from all over the World.
I come from a Native family who did NOT participate in Thanksgiving.

[lisaYEAH]

My being gay definitely affects my Thanksgiving. My mom's side of the family, with whom we spend Thanksgiving, are all pretty stuffy Jews who adored me before I came out and now won't so much as say hello to me. I'm pretty torn about it. Part of me wants to get up on the dinner table and scream at them for being so ignorant but the other half wants to sever all ties because why would I want to be around people like that? They don't accept me, so why should I accept them?

I've been out for about six months and this was the first large family gathering since then. Does anyone who's been through a similar situation have any advice? I never thought this would happen to me, as naive as that sounds.

[angel fu@k]

My moms side of the family has chosen not to invite us to holidays or any other gathering since I have came out. They deny that its because Im gay, but its pretty weird that we havent been invited in 5 years, when we attended frequently. My other side of the family isnt that close to do funtions, but accept me as me. :) My GFs family is awesome! We would be attending many things if we lived closer to Florida. I made Thanksgiving in my own little apt with my mom and GF.