Jo's Page

Update, August 20, 2009 - PLEASE NOTE LINK TO MY NEW BLOG ABOVE

Well, I continue to be amazed by the entrenched anti-gay bigotry that's inherent in corporate and government entities. My partner Leslie and I were legally married in October, 2008, in California - just a couple of weeks before Proposition 8 passed. We were among roughly 18,000 couples whose marriages were upheld, even when the State Supreme Court ruled that Proposition 8 was indeed legal under the State constitution, and no more gay marriages could be performed in the aftermath of the passage of Prop 8.

By policy, I should have been covered by Leslie's insurance for medical, dental and vision as of November 1, 2008. But, wait... It seems to have made a difference, us being a lesbian couple. Big surprise, huh? We were given any number of excuses, and finally told that coverage would be in effect as of June 1, 2009. Okay, well the medical part worked. And I went in for a dental exam and x-rays, as I had teeth that had been in the red zone from a year before when I'd lost dental coverage after I left my crazy-making job in the tech world.

As an adult survivor of CSA, I have lost a number of my teeth. I have always ground my teeth, even as a toddler, according to my mom, and I managed to break a lot of teeth and ground them into powder. That legacy has continued for decades, despite night guards and other such attempts at mitigating the damage.

We've now discovered that the insurance company LIED to us, and I won't have dental or vision coverage until January of 2010. In the meantime, I am in constant agony - one tooth is broken off down to the gumline, with the raw nerve visible. I cannot possibly afford to pay cash for oral surgery, so I'm taking Aleve and Tylenol like it's freaking TicTac, and it only begins to address the pain. Some days, I just sit and weep.

But if I've learned one thing in life, it's that it's a waste of time to spend a lot of energy on things I can't control. I'm carrying on as best I can, though some days that's not much. Had to blow off $150 tickets to see Melissa Etheridge the other night, because I was in so much pain I couldn't even move out of a fetal position.

I choose to see the absurdity in the situation, and know eventually I'll look back and laugh, albeit painfully. If you've seen me on Twitter, you know that I'm regularly throwing out genuine humor - I believe laughter is an absolutely essential tool for survival and well-being.

I'll keep y'all posted as things evolve. In the meantime, keep laughing!

Blessings and hugs to all of you!